Health & Sickness

My youngest was hospitalized last Tuesday due to bronchiolitis with minor ear infection. When he was unwell at first, i thought it was normal for babies to catch cough and runny nose. I believe in letting his body to generate own immune system thus I was not that worried at first.

Then we decided to see a doctor since our friend was pushing us to go because she thought it might be possible symptom of asthma as her first child had a similar sickness (it was on the 3rd day Kasyif was sick). Still, i didn't worry much... I was still not that convinced until the dr who attended my baby at a clinic referred him to KPJ Kajang! Kasyif was hospitalised for 2 days and was discharged by Wednesday 20th May.

Moral of the story....yes, it's good that i don't want to rely on medicine to heal but for babies, i just need to be more careful. I was glad to take on my friend's advice, thus the experience of attending a sick child. If i was too proud to bring Kasyif to the doctor, Kasyif's sickness could be severe.


While at the hospital, I've been thanking Allah SWT for the health He has given the whole family. Kasyif case is considered minor, i don't know whether i can handle what other unfortunate families have to go through. Semoga Allah memberi mereka kekuatan, sesungguhnya ujian Allah itu adalah untuk mengingatkan kita akan kebesaranNya.....


I'm grateful that Kasyif made a quick recovery.

Friends vs Acquaintance

I've gained my momentum back. I was quite demotivated last few weeks. Maybe because now i'm anticipating our family trip to Redang Island this coming June.
For 34 years of living, i have made quite a journey and met people from different walks of life. But mostly i don't keep in touch with. Imagine if i did, i could have a good network.... I can say i don't have lots of friends that i can hang out with at the moment. My friends are as many as the fingers on my hands (or maybe less)....I'm the type who don't keep an address book where i can use to contact people once in a while. I did wrote people addresses/phone but i don't know where the book is now. It's not that i am a loner. I was just so hooked up on everything else that i forgot to keep in touch...Now after so many years, suddenly i feel i need to make the effort to start meeting old friends again. Why? Because i was thinking would anyone come to my funeral when i die? How many people do i know that close enough and would pay the last respect? It scares me because i know the answer.

Anyway, 2 contrasting incidents happened to me. One, i was given a pat on the back by an old friend while i was doing my 'pasar' shopping. She is my ex secondary schoolmate and i was very delighted. I truthfully said i can't remember her name but surely i remembered her face (i was surprised she could remember mine)...i wasn't that close to her back then but i really respect her for coming up to me to say hi. I gave her my phone number (i didn't bring my handphone to record her number....duh)...She lives nearby so i will make an effort to invite her over to my house (unfortunately she still hasn't sms me her number until now)...

Two, i brought the kids to UKM swimming pool last Sunday. I wanted to see whether it's true that babies can swim. No! i didn't just throw my 7 mth old baby in the swimming pool....Kasyif was afraid at first but later he enjoyed being in the water. He was kicking and flapping his arms but he can't swim yet. I could tell he can float if i let him go but i don't dare to do it just yet. Not until he knows how to deal with the clorine getting into his mouth/nose....sorry, got side tracked.

There was someone in the same swimming pool who used to be a friend. She was busy swimming that maybe she didn't recognise me. (Hmmm...there weren't a lot of people actually)..I said 'used to be' because i don't know who am I to her. Back then, we rarely talked about personal matters but we mixed and said hi. We even went to a holiday together but still i don't feel she treats me as a friend. More like 'i'm a friend to you since our husbands are friends'. That day verified a bit about my assumption. We both pretended didn't see each other....i used to have this attitude 'if you don't come up to me, why should i?'....but i've changed now (a bit)....i will make the effort to greet her if she doesn't (i think she goes to UKM every weekend, and i've just started swimming after childbirth).... I just hope she will not think that i'm just bugging her weekend activity.....

So whether they are friends or acquaintance, old or forgotten....you should make the effort to refresh the relationship. Because they have added another colour in your life and made your lifestory from nothing to a bit interesting.......Maybe just a tiny little bit but isn't that better than not having any? I've also made an effort to call a friend and plan to meet up this Friday...I was quite proud of myself for doing that....It is not so me (the bad me) but i did it....I did it to improve myself and show her that i appreciate her as a friend.....

After a hard day work

I had the time to browse and read people's blog... Found a friend's blog and reading it gave me a wake up call. Back to what is my purpose....how do i see myself in 10 years time? Because my friend is currently in New Zealand starting her PhD. killing two birds with one stone...Advancing her career ladder (once finishes her PhD) and having a good time overseas. I wish i could be ambitious like her.
And also found a cousin's blog interesting with pics...stories she has written about this and that....places she has been.....wow! I wish i could be creative like her....
After a while, i felt so down. I felt like i am a loser.....i have nothing about myself that i can be proud of..... Maybe that's why i keep wishing i could be like someone else.
Then, i found what my cousin wrote about 'the grass is always greener on the other side'. And about the saying in Koran "to lower your gaze from looking at forbidden things or else your heart will turn black, with envy, jealousy, desire, dissatisfaction, greed and the worst of all is, it makes you wanting more than you rightly deserves"....isn't that so true....

I was dissatisfied with myself and jealous of what other people have.....Not good, not good.....I should be happy for them and thankful for what i have and someday i might have something that i will be proud of if i asked and with Allah's willing.
Be thankful, be thankful....And for that reason, this is one of the things that i treasure most and i'm so thankful to Allah for what He has laid for me so far....I believe more good are laid in front of me if i keep on striving with effort and doa.....

Having you is the greatest thing (apart from your dad :-)...) Please Allah! Give me strength to raise my kids along your path.....